Thursday, February 25, 2010

An open letter:

We are fed up. We've been sick. It's the end of February. I would like it to be the end of winter.

This is an open letter to everything that sucks.

Dear Cold,
Please go away. I am tired of the coughing, the sniffling, the blowing of noses, the wiping of noses, the dripping noses, the chasing of small children to wipe said noses. Go. Away.

Dear Laundry,
Please do yourself. Thank you.

Dear Winter,
Please go away. I think you and Cold should head south. Head west. Head east. Whatever. Just get out of my face. I think I made a good go of it. I skated. I tobogganed. I bundled my children one million times to go play in the snow. I shovelled. I pushed my bundled kids on swings in snowy parks. I would prefer sunshine and sandals and warm evenings now. Your cooperation is appreciated.

Dear Olympics,
Please end. I have watched very little of you, but you are bugging me now. I am tired of strange, weird sports dominating the news (or as I like to think of it "not-news." Cheery Vancourites with your green grass and happy flowers, you annoy me, and Hockey??? Well, Hockey, I hate you. Chase your stupid little puck, bash in a few heads, get your medals; just get it over with.

Dear Mittens,
Stay on my children's hands. Oh, and don't get wet either. They hate that.

Dear Neighbour,
Why you would want a dog I cannot understand. Why you would choose to have four dogs is beyond my comprehension. The reason for letting those four dogs crap all over your lawn all winter without cleaning up any of it -- well, I can't think of any rational for that at all, but I do think, Neighbour, it's time to get shoveling. It's time.

Dear City of Ottawa,
Please stop debating about strollers on buses. You are the freaking capital city of Canada. Set a good example.

Dear Elmo,
Stop laughing like that.



Dear Dylan,
Thanks for putting up with our grumpy, snotty, sick souls. You always have a hug handy when needed.

Dear So and So...

Tuesday, February 23, 2010

We've been sick: lying-on-the-living-room-floor-watching-Elmo-all-day sick, coughing-so-hard-we-cry sick, being-generally-whiny-and-clingy sick.
It's been a long, snotty week, but things are looking up.

And through it all, the two coughing, snotty children have remained best friends.
As noses dry up and energy levels return, we can get back to our regularly scheduled cuddles and cuteness.